Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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