brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Your tits are I can't wait for
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
