Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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