they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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