i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
