You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
where are my eyebrows?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
