"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
