The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
