So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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