What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Randomize
