Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
