Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
