Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
