Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
