yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
