That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
