Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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