STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
