why didn't you poke me back
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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