spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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