i just google imaged poop.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
