just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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