They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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