It's like God shit irony all over that family
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
