Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize