yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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