When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
