guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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