I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
