he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Randomize
