how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
You work out of a Hotel?
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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