I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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