So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
