the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
