I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
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He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
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I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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