I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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