Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize