He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize
