We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
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Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
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