real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Help. Why am I so naked?
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