So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
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