Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
