SEEEEXXX PLEASE
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
