I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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