It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
