ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
