If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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