The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
