It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize