Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
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