I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Randomize
